8-28-24
This gunna sound so bad and I thought I would have learned from last year but I really just want to be cool and acknowledged. Like I'm a huge observer, I match and just observe what other people do. It's weird and I wish I was able to be myself with new people. It takes me a long time to just be myself, I'm always this fake person with other people so it requires a lot of energy to be friends and become friends. I don't know if it doesn't come naturally but I want so badly to find friends and people that make me feel cool. I'm not sure how to explain it. I've always always wanted to feel this way. It's weird and makes no sense, but I also think that if this is the way I think then I'm putting so much pressure on other people to make me feel happy. During summer i dont think I'm putting too much pressure to go out and look good and in the end I do end up looking good or hot or whatever. At school though I'll put so much effort into my